Changeling: A Review

This is the story of a true life case regarding the plight of Christine Collins and her lost son, Walter. The depth of the movie surprised me since I was not aware of the encompassing happenings dealing with police corruption and grisly crimes committed in Wineville, California.

I don't want to say too much plot-wise, because I feel that not knowing made the movie more shocking to me, hence you should view it that way as well. I did not realize that this was directed by Clint Eastwood, but it became evident very quickly why he chose to bring this dark chapter of California history to light.

Set in the late 1920's, costumes, production value and cinematography were all well done. The casting was excellent, especially when you compare Gordon Northcott's actual photo to the actor who played him. John Malkovich was awesome as usual and perfect for the role of the Reverend Gustav A. Briegleb. Angelina did well as Christine Collins, however I felt she overdid in some parts, though it did not ruin the movie. I understand why she received a nomination but not the Oscar for her performance.

Changeling was heart-wrenching, stomach-turning, and sad. I admit that I not only cried but sobbed at times during this film. It was a horrifyingly true story (with Hollywood taking the usual liberties of course) that transcends time. It is a really well done movie with surprisingly little in the way of "Hollywood liberties" as far as the research I have done. That said, it's a hard movie to stomach for anyone because of the truth to it, and probably especially hard to take if you are a Mother.

Jasper Hale Approves of "Friday Freakout"

Thursday Thoughts

Where should I start? I have a lot of thoughts today.

1. Why is it that everytime I start a project at work and get a few weeks into it thinking that I am halfway though and making progress, the powers that be decide that they are "rethinking" their strategy? I can understand if this happened once in a while, but it has happened for the last 5 or 6 projects and frankly I am starting to get REALLY annoyed. I have even asked the questions, "This is the direction we are going in, everyone is on board, etc?" before I start a project now, but it doesn't seem to help. I need to get out of here, I can't hardly breathe today from this unorganized mess. I used to try to keep everyone else as organized as I am but it just isn't working. You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink...

2. I am addicted to the show Paranormal State on A&E. They are the only show I have seen that actually combines paranormal research with the social and human aspect. They enlist psychics, mediums and counselors and have helped many families deal with issues that are paranormal as well as human in nature. They seem to have found some compelling evidence for the paranormal which is really cool, but the thing that I love is that at the heart of all these investigations there is concern for the people it affects, especially psychologically. It's amazing how teaching people to take back the power in a situation can do.

One Psychic/Medium that is regularly on the show is Chip Coffey and will be in my city in May. Love him! I am going to go and see the panel he is on, which is taking place in the theater we did the "ghost hunt" and presentation in a few Halloweens. Here is the old post. The Director of PRS, Ryan, is my "paper soul mate", which means on paper we are a great match...if you believe what you read. Most importantly he has strong convictions and beliefs and is a good leader. I love the rest of the cast as well. If Elfie ever gets tired of Historical research, I would gladly take over! They all seem very real and down to earth. You should check it out, 10pm on Mondays on A&E.

3. That last thought was kinda long. So I will make this one short: I think I am gonna go home and play me some Tomb Raider.

4. I was thinking of starting a second blog. Just videos. Videos that I take on my new camera. Like road trips and silly things. What do you think?

5. Oh, Twilight. So Big Geek got the dvd, something I said I would NEVER buy. After she brought me her copy (she said she wouldn't watch it with me because I would laugh at it too much)I watched the entire two discs. I come to the same conclusions. The story was cool but they misssed the mark on many things. The DP tried too hard to get those money shots and many seemed forced and contrived. Edward was perfect. The Cullens were well cast adn should have been featured more. Jasper is AWESOME! The music was lame. The sound editing and music editing was HORRENDOUS!(It's amazing how more blindingly truthful listening to it on nice headphones is). Bella was terrible. I came to the conclusion that if everything else stayed the same, the one thing that would make me enjoy this movie the most is if they would have cast someone other than Kristen Stewart. She is terrible even laughable at times (think hospital bed argument with Edward). If this had been filmed 6-7 years ago, Rachel McAdams would have been my pick for Bella. But alas, we are stuck with the whiney, eye rolling Kristen Stewart.

Some Memes from FB

1.WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? I think I was orginally supposed to be named Mary after my Grandmother, but then I wasn't

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Last Wednesday

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITNG? Sometimes

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Depends on my mood

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? No

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Yes, but being friends with me has been hard work lately.

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM? Sometimes

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? I think they are still there, unless Sid the Wiley Tonsil thief stole them!

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Yes, preferably with a cute guy strapped to me.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? I don't have a favorite, I like a lot of cereals

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Not usually

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Hmmm...Coffee, Phish Food, Heavenly Hash, I just like ice cream!

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? If they have a kind face, it's all it the eyes...

15. RED OR PINK? Depends on my mood, mostly Red though I think

16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?My inability to commit to a career path

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? Jenn Souder

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST? Sure

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Brown Cargo pants, black boots

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? Office chatter and keyboard noises

22. WHAT COLOR CRAYON ARE YOU? Magenta

23. FAVORITE SMELLS? Spring, Snowfalls, Summer evenings by the campfire, Dad's Sauce cooking on the stove, Fresh cut flowers

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Beth at work a few minutes ago. But it wasn't work related:)

25. HOW DO YOU KNOW THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
I have known Jessica ever since the beginning of time!

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Volleyball

27. HAIR COLOR? Brown with a bit of reddish in the right light

28. EYE COLOR? Brown, but depending on the day, they are half green sometimes.

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Nope. My Eyes are healthy, just went to the eye Dr!

30. FAVORITE FOODS? Good God! Dad's Lasagna, Steak, Seafood esp crab, Thai, Mexican, the list goes on and on...

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? How about a scary movie WITH a happy ending.

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? In the Theater "He's Just Not That into You", at home either: "Dark Knight" or "The Duchess" can't recal which was last.

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Black

34. SUMMER OR WINTER? Any season but Spring (mud season!)

35. HUGS OR KISSES? DO I have to choose?

37. DESCRIBE YOUR PENCIL CUP. Huh? it's got pens and pencils and highlighters in it and it's not a cup it's an actual desk holder of writing implements. At home it's a paisley mug tho!

38. FAVORITE ARTIST(s)? Music: STING, RHCP, are tops but I like LOTS of different music.

39. WHAT BOOK (s) ARE YOU READING NOW? Gothic Tales. It's a series of short stories compiled in a collection from Reader's Digest. A nice little bargain book I picked up from B&N about big gothic mansions, mysteries and ghosts!

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? It's boring and gray.

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? Chuck and Paranormal State

42. FAVORITE SOUND(S). Laughter, Music, Thunderstorms, Falling snow, The chaos of my family when we are all together in one place!

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? How can you choose?

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? London, UK

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Apparently I am witty.

46 WHERE WERE U BORN? Little Falls, NY

47. FAVORITE PIECE OF JEWELRY? A beautiful necklace my Mom gave me that I had had my eye on for months.

48. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER? I haven't yet, but I can tell you that he is brave and stands by his convictions, is honest, trustworthy, likes to travel, is a buffy fan, and has a great sense of humor and sense of self.



A to Z all about me


A - Age:33
B - Bed size: Queen. I love my bed.
C - Chore you hate: Cleaning the bathtub
D - Dad's Name: Domiano
E - Essential start your day item: Good music to drive to work to
F - Favorite actor(s):
G - Gold or Silver: Silver
H - Height: 5'3
I - Instruments you play(ed): Piano, Sax, Trombone!
J - Job title: Marketing Manager
K - Kid(s): No!
L - Living arrangements: Me, Myself and I
M - Mom's name: Lois
N - Nicknames: CC, Catink, Tarol,
O - Overnight hospital stay other than birth: Yes.
P - Pet Peeve(s): People who litter,
Q - Quotes you like: I constantly wuote from shows and movies like Buffy and Dark Knight, among others, but Master Po said this to me and it rings true: "First, there is a mountain, Then, there is no mountain, Then, there is a mountain"
R - Right or left handed: Right
S - Siblings: 3 brothers and 3 sisters I won't list them and your welcome!
T - Time you wake up: I should wake up at 6:30am but it's usually 7am
U - Underwear? At work yes, at home no.
V - Vegetable you dislike: I like all vegtables, but there is a legume I am not trilled with: Lima Beans
W - Ways you run late: HUH? Because I hate work?
X - X-rays you've had: Teeth, CT Scan
Y - Yummy food you make: Ziti, Chicken and Snow Pea Stir Fry, Omlettes, I make up my own Mexican recipes, oven baked chicken, Steak and mushrooms... I like to experiment and usually it comes out great!
Z - Zodiac: Scorpio

It's a New Day

Out with the dark, in with the light. Let's make this happy stay for a while.

Why So Serious? I mean, it could be worse. I could have been Anne Boleyn...or Rachel Dawes in The Dark Knight... or Marion when she is thrown into the pit with the snakes in Raiders...or even (forgive another Indy reference) when Willie has to stick her hand into that hole in the wall to pull the lever and save Indy and Short Round and all those disgusting bugs are in there!! Well, you get the idea. ;)

Why was I wallowing in self-pity? It's a time waster, an energy drainer, and a dream dasher. Not only was I hurting myself and my drive, but I was becoming a worry to my friends. The weekend home with Family really snapped me out of that funk. Once again, it's time to "Get Off My Ass!" and keep moving forward.

And so the funk subsides and the happy me comes back to life, full of hope, endless possibilities and the urge to make whatever changes needed. I still HATE my job, mind you, however, my energy is better spent "someplace that's else".

In this time of scorpio rebirth, I feel the overwhelming need to simplify. It's "Love it" or "Chuck it" time at my place this week/weekend. Everything from wardrobe to books, from hair products to cd's will be judged. Nostalgia beware, only the most cherrished will survive!

Just a cool little note to add: My coworker Sam introduced me to someone this morning, an old neighbor who he grew up with who was familiar with my hometown, and he thought I was 24. Just another thing to be happy about! I have never looked as old as I am, not that 33 is old, but I definitely appreciate a 9 year difference! :)

Friday Freakout

As I finally head out of the depression abyss I was lost in for a few days, I have to thank a few people who helped me "turn towards the light Carol Ann". This was one of the toughest weeks ever for me and I only made it through because I have such amazing friends, though I am not sure I deserve them.

Big Geek: What would I do without her? She listens, she gives good advice, she sets me straight and she makes me laugh even when I am a pouty, whiney brat. She is like my sister Lamby, although 3 cubicles down. Big Geek is awesome, and even though she knows it already, I really should tell her that more often. Beth, you rock! Thanks!

Chantal: We had dinner at Moe's Tuesday night and it brightened my mood considerably. I think the thing that really made me try harder to get out of my funk was the fact that she said she cried when she read my blog. I am glad she said that because I would never want to make my friends sad, especially Chantal because she is such a good egg who wants the best for everyone and deserves the best herself! Thanks Chantal!

Nate: Good old Nate. He is like the twin brother I never had. I was thinking of calling him Thursday night, and then he beat me to it. Psychic link perhaps? We had a great conversation and caught up with each other. It's nice to know there is someone else going through similar work woes and that laughing about how we both want a garage filled with various movie and tv cars (Knight Rider, Back to the Future, A-team, Scoobie Doo, etc) can make us both feel better. Much thanks Nate.

Ariane: She is always keeping an eye on me, even from the Big Apple. She has been my saving grace more than once, and she is such a wonderful person. She is definitely one of my heros. She sent me a Jack Sparrow Nite Light for Pete's sake! Just for the heck of it because she thought I would get a kick out of it. I get a kick out of you Ari! Thanks!

I always thought I was low maintenance, but I realize, especially lately, I am quite the pain in the ass. I appreciate all of you who have stood by me through all of my ups and downs, it could not have been very easy or fun. I have been very selfish of late and I promise to brush that chip off my shoulder. You know I am here for all of you as well, and would do anything to help you as long as it suits my mood at the time...I AM KIDDING of course! Seriously, I 've got your backs!

Now that I have gotten all the mushy out, please take a moment to enjoy a Cubicle Freakout! (Notice the url, and for the record, I know someone who can do that...He's married to Big Geek.)

LAUGH

Excerpts and Apathy

Apathy is a lack of feeling or emotion, of concern or interest and is a perfect description of me lately. I feel sort of numb and distanced from everything.

Excerpts from "Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now" by The Smiths

"I was looking for a job, and then I found a job
And heaven knows I'm miserable now

In my life
Why do I give valuable time
To people who don't care if I live or die ?"

"In my life
Why do I smile
At people who I'd much rather kick in the eye ?"


Perhaps I am not completely apathetic to everything around me. I still feel emotion when it comes to my family and a few close friends, but everything else is just cardboard cutouts.

I am tired and not motivated at work and at home. I feel like an empty shell of myself actually.

Exerpt from "Going Through the Motions" The Buffy Musical

"Going through the motions,
losing all my drive
I can't even see
if this is really me
and I just want to be
Alive"


I have been hitting my snooze 4-5 times each morning and reluctantly throw on something really casual for work. I used to only wear jeans on Casual Fridays but now I rarely wear any of my dress pants or skirts and usually wear cords or jeans.

I have been arriving 5-20 minutes late 2-3 times a week now for the past 3 weeks and I don't care.

I don't walk around and talk to anyone anymore. I stay at my desk, make sure my work is caught up and then play search and find games on the internet for 1-2 hours throughout the day with my MP3 player on.

Excerpt from "Still Ill" by The Smiths

"And if you must, go to work - tomorrow
Well, if I were you I really wouldn't bother
For there are brighter sides to life
And I should know, because I've seen them
But not very often ..."


So here I sit, drinking my green tea and typing on my blog, which is not giving me the satisfaction it usually does when I post.

Am I sabotaging myself conciously (or unconciously) at work? Maybe.

Why do I just want to go home and lay on the couch and not get outside in this nicer than normal weather to take a walk when I get home at night? I know it would help if I got some exercise and fresh air, but I just can't bring myself to do it. I am so drained by the time I get home from work, I turn into a couch slug. I just don't want to talk to anyone or see anyone. I know that sounds really bad.

I usually come out of these funks within a few days. I have said this before, but they are getting worse and more frequent. I just need a change. A break from what my life has become would probably help break this pattern I am in. What I am living now is obviously not working for me, so I need to change it.

Just for Fun

Just for fun I typed in "Career Change at 33" into Google.
Apparently, there's an old saying (One I hadn't heard before)"The dog would have caught the rabbit if he didn't stop to take a shit." The person who wrote this in response to a 33 year old contemplating career change followed up with " Are you going to chase that rabbit or stop to take a shit?" A bit rough, but true!

Just for fun, I would like to tell everyone here at work to take a hike. It would be even better if they then turned around and told me that.

Just for fun I was thinking of joining a 2-3 month volunteer program in a foreign country. I could teach children or work preserving historical sites. I was thinking Peru, but I need to work on my Spanish skills.

Just for fun, I looked into learning a new language or fortifying my German or Spanish skills through Rosetta Stone.

Just for fun I watched (most of)"Girl Interupted" last night and now think maybe I have borderline personality disorder. ha. ha.

Then, just for fun, I watched "Nim's Island" because GB is in it. It was terrible, had tons of promise but was horribly cast and written. A few laughable contrived lines: "Be the hero of your own story" and "Take my hand, touch the world" Pulease!!! What was Jodi Foster THINKING????

Just for fun, I would lie to flood TAP's email box with tons of stupid emails while he is on vacation this week. But I won't because I don't want to expend my energy on that. I have bigger fish to fry.

Just for fun, I would like to be mostly happy instead of mostly sad and frustrated like I am lately. I will turn it around eventually. It's all me.

Bad Juju

I have a weird feeling. I guess it's been ever since they had another layoff here a few weeks back in the middle of the quarter that I have really started to worry.

I am not worried about losing my job for my job's sake. Obviously I have been abundantly clear on this blog that I am no longer a fan of my position here. Here I have been doing my work and keeping my head down and watching and listening.

What I do worry about is my apartment lease. I cannot afford my apartment for more than 2 - 3 months without a job, 4 months depending on what sort of severence they offer (usually only one month's salary) and whatever unemployment I could get. Yes, it is good I have something put away, but I don't want to use up my savings either.

Little things have me wondering, like postponing a website rebuild and noone can tell me why, but we have to wait until April. My boss asking me to post my marketing schedule on the common drive and TAP asking me about copies of all the promos and eblasts we have done. Sort of like they are trying to get information on things, so they are aware if I am let go. Funny thing is, everything is right here on my computer and in my well organized filing system and they can paw through it all once I am gone. I have of course, already taken things for my portfolio, but other copies remain here too since I would never be like that.

Another thing is that I have heard from people that "no one is safe" and even though I already knew that, coming from certain people it holds more weight.

It's been really weird here the last few days, lots of meetings and HR keeps paging Managers from different departments which usually means one thing..."We need to cut some of your people, who can you give up?"

I guess tomorrow is Friday and we will find out who gets put out to pasture. I am sort of 50/50 if it is me since it would feel like a blessing AND a curse.

Whatever Wednesday

It's been a while since I did a Whatever Wednesday post of random thoughts, so here...we...go!

I have been playing a lot of Tomb Raider lately. "Legend" is my game of choice this week. I have been going back and playing levels over so that I can find all the artifacts and open up new outfits etc. Escapism is my favorite hobby!

My calendar at work says yesterday was the full moon, but my calendar at home says today is the full moon. If the skies stay clear tonight, I will have to see which one is right. My bet is on the home calendar.

I do everything a supervisor does but I am not technically considered the sample lady's supervisor. HR calls me to see if she can use help, TAP calls me to check on her performance etc, I answer all of her questions and troubleshoot any issues she is having etc but when they cut her hours, does anyone tell me? NOPE. Of course not. I mean, why should I be told about that important piece of information?

Headaches. I have them more often than usual lately. I think they are stress induced. I have many of them while at work. Hmmm...curious.

Lots of people getting shot or shooting other people lately. Alabama and Germany are two headliners today on MSN. I guess things are getting worse before they get better.

Not to downplay the previous random thing, but I have this fantasy that when anyone (especially the college kids) in my complex comes in with bass blasting so loud I can feel the rumble in my apartment (and then they leave their car running and blasting for 15 minutes while they run inside) that I will rip open my window, stick a rocket launcher out the window and shoot it at the car. Big explosion. Cheers from the neighbors. No more "bass boost"!

Finally some sun today. I was all excited that the Spring ahead clocks would allow me almost an hour of light now when I get home from work, enabling me to start walking. The last few days have been rainy and yucky, but today it is sunny (though a bit colder)so I can walk when I get home. :)

Chantal, if you are reading this, you need to check out my answer to your comment on the last post. A jokerized letter made only of Joker Quotes...you will LOVE IT!:)

Top Ten Reasons Why I Hate My Job

10. The coffee here SUCKS.
9. I like 3 people in the company...TOTAL
8. It's located in Syracuse, NY.
7. None of the higher ups ever follow the chain of command which makes communication about scope and approvals on projects almost impossible.
6. I feel more fufilled blogging than doing my daily "chores"
5. T.A.P. (The Texas Asshole, Blowhard, Bullshitting, Lazy-assed, butt-kissing, flip-flopping, Herman Munster look alike piece of SHIT...)
4. Nepotism prevails even in a time of layoffs. Playing office to add to the money you already have while people who gave 18+ years to the company to fill your pockets and still have nothing are laid off is just wrong.
3. Poor management styles that go unchecked.
2. Being stuck in the middle of poor communication and management skills between the higher ups, and designers who need to be spoon fed.
1. Bored Now. (I am bored with the products I am marketing, bored with the people and bored with the industry.)

OK, so maybe many of these things are part of ANY job. I obviously have an issue with authority, get bored easily and enjoy good coffee. Does this mean I should own my own coffee shop? :)

(and other sundry things)

The Smithsonian is stalking me. They have a great price on their magazine right now. I had stopped getting the subscription a year ago because is was too expensive. This offer sounds great though. I think I may renew. I do enjoy the magazine.

In the current economy I think there are a few places where you can still make a living: Mortuary Science (because everyone dies sometime), Health Care (for now anyway), and Movie Theaters (people love to escape from reality, especially now).

I saw an ad the other day that said the Mathmatics is the language of the world because no matter what language you speak, it is the same for everyone. I suppose that is true and as I always felt that Music was the universal language. Both are accurate since Music is after all mathmatically based.

Sometimes, I like to push T.A.P.'s buttons (see #5 above). I guess it is childish, but I see it as tit for tat. He likes to use stupid sayings in emails that he sends me with marching orders (even tho he is not my boss) like : okie dokie, "Me thinks..." and "What say you??" with lots of punctuation as well as smiley emoticons :) or ;) The other day after he sent me a long email I replied that (in the fashion of his earlier remarks) he probably should "run this by the president before we get started on this, okie dokie?" Boy did I get the reaction I was looking for. I chose my button pushing moments carefully, and this one was long overdue. I gotta admit, it was really fun.

Well, enough of my spouting off. It's Friday!!!

Everyone Needs a Hero

Thanks to Big Geek (Beth), I was able to partake in some sunshine this afternoon. She sent me the link to "The Hero Factory" so I could make my own hero as she did. Here are two that I made. Go make your own! It's a riot!

If I had long Orange Hair and a flame thrower I'd be:



And if I cut my hair short, slapped a "C" on my spandex and grabbed my crossbow:

Blog as Journal

As I look back on previous posts I realize even more why I love my blog. It is really my journal to express my feelings and thought at the time, that usually, help me grow to a new place even a few days later. I enjoy going back and reading all the psycho-ish thoughts I have had in the past. They make me laugh.

Any way you look at it, this blog is my therapy, because let's face it, I need it! I can't believe that noone commented on my Hockey post. I thought it was an interesting comment on crowd mentality at sporting events and the violence we (willingly or unwillingly, knowingly or unknowingly) allow into our lives as well as our children's lives.

Lately, my search for a more meaningful career, a niche, a calling as it were, is tops on my spew list here in cclifeblog. I am sane enough to kow I am working through things, although not privately, but for the sake of some feedback from you gentle readers. I guess that is just how I roll.

Look, the reality is this: My company has lost over 1/3 of it's work force through layoffs in the past 9 months. The most recent layoffs came two weeks ago before the end of a quarter (which makes me even more nervous). Then hourly workers who were left had their hours cut. It is commonly known from good sources that the company is giving it the old college try for another 6 months and will then re-examine the options at that time. Like many companies, the air is thick with fear and uncertainty, which in my case breeds the search for a job I enjoy.

When it comes to my current situation I feel like Lloyd Dobler in "Say Anything":
"I don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don't want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, I don't want to do that. "

Hockey as Acceptable Violence?

Saturday night I attended a local hockey game for the Syracuse Crunch. A friend from work had invited me along and I jumped at the chance since I had enjoyed watching hockey back in my college days. These teams are in the American Hockey League (AHL), or the stepping stone to pro NHL careers. We played the Albany River Rats that night, a big rivalry, so it was sure to be an exciting game.

For me, I love the fast pace and the tough guys on ice skates who are so graceful and forceful at the same time. The place was packed and to my guess the seats were probably 90% full filled with men, women, young boys and girls from 3 years to 16 years. It seemed like quite the family outing. I enjoy it when they smash into the glass in front of you, but that's about as violent as I like. What I wasn't used to was the fighting and more importantly, the audience's reaction to a fight between players. Back in college, there was no fighting allowed, but here, fighting is part of the (gasp) entertainment!

Picture the Colosseum...wait, I mean the War Memorial in Syracuse. Two players are pushing and shoving each other. The Crunch guy trips the River Rat with his stick and he falls hard on the ice. Next thing you know the River Rat is up, gloves and helmet are off and the Refs are surrounding the two players. They keep the teammates away and blow their whistles to commence the fight. These two guys punch each other until one falls (then the fight is over, the guy who fell first the loser) or until the Ref's feel they need to break it up.

My attention was quickly taken from the fight to the reaction of the crowd. It was incredible. People were standing up, pounding their own fists into the air and yelling for their guy to win. By win I mean violently punch and beat the crap out of the other guy. What was more appalling was the fact that the young children were jumping up and down, screaming and rooting for their player as well. I sat there in awe while two men punched each other as adults and small children egged them on. It was barbaric.

I am a people watcher, I can't help it. It seemed second nature to me to watch the crowd reaction instead of the fight and when I mentioned it to my friends, they really hadn't looked at it from my point of view before. I guess you could say that I was shocked. Sure, I watch violent movies like "Wanted", but I know those are fake. Seeing two people fight in reality is scary to me. I hate boxing and wrestling for that reason and I think ultimate fighting is disgusting.

I guess my comment on society is two-fold from this experience:

• First, we think we are so civilized with our blackberries and designer shoes, but this showed me that we are no further evolved than the Romans and Greeks with their vicious fights at the Colosseum, or even the times of crowds attending beheadings and hangings. Perhaps violence is an ingrained form of human expression, and is not something that we will ever lose.
• Secondly, this mob mentality was unsettling. Almost everyone in the stadium was in on the fight. The fact that even small children were contributing was really interesting, since they see their parents and every other adult acting this way, so they follow suit. I wonder if they really understand what is happening. I bet most of the adults don't realize it either simply because after all, it's just part of the game, right?