Bad Juju

I have a weird feeling. I guess it's been ever since they had another layoff here a few weeks back in the middle of the quarter that I have really started to worry.

I am not worried about losing my job for my job's sake. Obviously I have been abundantly clear on this blog that I am no longer a fan of my position here. Here I have been doing my work and keeping my head down and watching and listening.

What I do worry about is my apartment lease. I cannot afford my apartment for more than 2 - 3 months without a job, 4 months depending on what sort of severence they offer (usually only one month's salary) and whatever unemployment I could get. Yes, it is good I have something put away, but I don't want to use up my savings either.

Little things have me wondering, like postponing a website rebuild and noone can tell me why, but we have to wait until April. My boss asking me to post my marketing schedule on the common drive and TAP asking me about copies of all the promos and eblasts we have done. Sort of like they are trying to get information on things, so they are aware if I am let go. Funny thing is, everything is right here on my computer and in my well organized filing system and they can paw through it all once I am gone. I have of course, already taken things for my portfolio, but other copies remain here too since I would never be like that.

Another thing is that I have heard from people that "no one is safe" and even though I already knew that, coming from certain people it holds more weight.

It's been really weird here the last few days, lots of meetings and HR keeps paging Managers from different departments which usually means one thing..."We need to cut some of your people, who can you give up?"

I guess tomorrow is Friday and we will find out who gets put out to pasture. I am sort of 50/50 if it is me since it would feel like a blessing AND a curse.