Make Up My Mind

Wiccachicky had asked how the job hunt is going, so I thought I would post my journey so far. i hope you are in the mood to read a bit! It's not so much a job hunt yet, but a soul-searching that will hopfully lead me to the job hunt.

I have been reading career self help books like "The Career Guide for Creative and Unconventional People" and "Short Term Job Adventures" and taking lots of personality tests/career aptitude tests etc. I am doing this because I seem to know what I DON'T want, but have a hard time figuring out what I really DO want. I have many interests, but what makes me excited, gives me that fire and makes me thirst or more? To be more practical, which of these things can I make a living at???

Many people have the same job likes and dislikes as I do: "I hate being micromanaged", "I like to split my work time between working alone and with groups", or "I need to believe in and love (or like a lot) what I am doing to stay motivated and fufilled". I think the books have reinforced my true nature but I feel that my life experiences will help to draw the curtain back a bit, if I take the time to stop and look.

When I think back to my London trip this past fall, I remember how excited I was to visit the V & A and British Museums and Pembroke Castle in Wales. I had completely lost myself in these places losing track of time and space. I was at peace and speechless, but excited and rejuvinated. Who were the people that used these things, wore these clothes, lived in this place? What were their lives like? How did they affect future generations? I was moved to be standing in the midst of all this HISTORY!

I have always been in interested in history. I would spend hours looking through the Encyclopedia Brittanica (yea, remember those ginormus volumes?) reading about Egypt and other ancient civilizations. I told my guidance counselor every year from 6th grade on that I wanted to be an Archaeologist. My small town school laughed it off as a young movie buff's misguided intentions and when a trip to particiapte in a mock dig came up in 9th grade, they didn't pick me to attend. I was heartbroken, and tried to get a friend of mine to switch with me because she wasn't interested in going on a "dig". She went anyway even though she knew I was interested and she could care less. A few months later, when the Biology trip came up, I was chosen, knowing full well she wanted to go into a science field when she graduated, I declined her offer to let her go in my stead. The difference was, I enjoyed biology too, and she was picked for 99% of trips like that and I wasn't. I don't think I have any still active HS grudges, save this one. I feel I was cheated at a young age, which didn't help me in making the tough decisions about careers later in life.

When I got to college, I could make my own decisions, so I started taking Archaeology and Anthropology classes. I loved them and by the time I graduated, I realized that because I had taken so many Anthropology classes, I had enough credits to declare a second major (My first was Communications). Noone was excited about this but me, and it took a toll on my choices from there.

After college though, I heard the snickers of "Communications and Anthropology? What are you going to do with that major?" and the questions of interviewers who were evidently not very highly evolved. I think I got many jobs because I answered that question immediately and concisely expressing the similarities between the two disciplines and how they could intertwine in a corporate atmosphere. Eyebrows raised, lightbulbs went on and wheels started turning, whether they "got it" or not.

After all these years, I still go back to Anthro and History. The reason I never persued them is because, thruthfully, noone around me believed they were worthwhile careers. I am the type of person who needs back-up. If I have people who believe in me and my choices, I am more confident. If I had only been independent enough to ignore the naysayers and explore these options sooner, who knows where I would be right now? Maybe I would have found my niche. Maybe I would have hated it and gone a different path. The difference is at least I would have known!

I am done worrying about back-up and what people may say. A support system should only be there to help you when you fall, not play the game for you. I was never allowed to take any chances, and now I can. Maybe it's the wrong timing, maybe it's perfect timing. No matter what happens, I don't want to look back and regret that I never tried.