Ginormous Math Monster!

We can add money wasters to the already large list of time wasters here at my place of employment.

Today we had our quarterly Saftey Awards. These are mostly for the factory workers since office workers rarely have "accidents", but we all participate. Everyone who did not have an "accident" during the quarter is given a reward. Usually it is something you would most likely get as a free gift from a magazine subscription (cheap Chinese made junk) along with a pen and a sticky pad. They also recognize anniversary dates as well and give out gifts for 1, 5, 10, 15, 20 and 25 years with the company.

I get it, it's a morale booster and brings the factory and offices together for one common cause. However, when people are getting laid off, the sister of the owner's is still employed to play office and everyone's hours have been cut, these "rewards" seem a bit out of place. Most people grumble during these meetings that they would rather get their hours back than take home the junk that is given out. Ah, the power of Market Research...But I digress.

The purpose of this post was to show you all what we got today as our quarterly safety award. I am sure you will join the rest of this company in wondering what the hell Human Resources was thinking?


I kid you not. This calculator measures 8 x 11 1/2 inches! It is seriously the same footprint as my adding machine and does much less.

This would be great for small children or older people who need larger buttons.

Or perhaps a circus clown would enjoy typing in certain numbers that make words when you turn it upside down. Come on, you all did this in elementary school and know what I am talking about.

Maybe Henlib is right. Now that I have this amazingly Ginormous Calculator, I can finally join Britney's Circus Tour! Here's what the Poster should look like: